Green with Envy
by girlfromuncle
Summary: Severus and Lily have a more complicated past than anyone would have ever known, but even the strongest of bonds is not always enough for a happy ending.
1. Year 1: Snape

"For the hundredth time, Severus, stand up straight and get that scowl off of your face. You're a Snape, and it's about damn time you started acting like one."

Severus forcibly turned the corners of his mouth up into what resembled a passable smile, or at least didn't give quite so much contempt for the world around him. He looked up at his mother, an overbearing woman of about 45, slender and conventionally attractive enough, but somehow still completely unappealing. As she rambled on about decorum and pride, like she always tended to do whenever she felt that Severus wasn't upholding his family name, which she almost always did, Severus tuned her out and looked at the other children around him.

Severus suppressed a snarl. Everywhere on the platform were happy families wishing their children the best of luck at Hogwarts, and his mother was already expressing her severe disappointment in him. She knew he was worthless, and she didn't mind sharing that fact. Stand up straight, stop scowling, come out of your room and say hello to our very important friends, why aren't you showing any signs of magic, why can't you control your magic, be social, be polite, be in control, stop crying...if he was doing anything at all, his mother would find a way to correct it.

He had long tuned out his mother when Severus heard her say, "You will, of course, won't you?" He opened his mouth to flatly agree with whatever shrewish demand she was making now, when crash! Another student's cart flew directly into his.

"I am so sorry! I got lost! I was rushing because I was worried I wouldn't make the train, and, oh..." cried a beautiful, red-headed girl his age as she helped him back to his feet. His unremarkably brown eyes met her sparkling, emerald green ones, and all of the sarcastic remarks he was about to make died in his throat.

"It..it's okay. Are you alright?"

"Yes, thank you. Are you going to Hog-...oh..."

Severus wondered what was causing her voice to trail off like that, and realized that his ever beautiful and pleasant mother must have been staring her signature cold glare at this innocent girl for daring to touch the belongings of a Snape.

"You should run along, child." She spat.

The red-headed girl squeaked out an affirmative reply, grabbed her books, and ran back to her parents for one last goodbye hug before stepping on the crimson train to Hogwarts. He sighed internally, knowing that she would most likely never speak to him again after this. Oh, well. He was accustomed to living without friends, if you didn't count the half-retarted kids of noble wizard families that his mother constantly tried to get him to play with, he had none.

Severus looked up to his mother, afraid of what lay ahead for the first time. He reached his hand out to hers, looking for a hug, a smile...anything. What he got was a handshake, and one last speech about representing his family with honor and dignity. She abruptly turned on her heels and strode away, leaving Severus scared and alone. He figured he better get used to this feeling, so he took one last look at the muggle world around him, and boarded the Hogwarts Express with fear and hope battling it out for dominance inside of him.


	2. Year 1: Lily

Great was an understatement. This was the enormous, terrifying, thrilling hall where the next seven years of Lily's life would take place. There were long, long tables that held every kind of food and drink imaginable, though Lily was so nervous that she couldn't begin to imagine eating any of it. She saw candles floating everywhere, rich, red and gold drapes lining the halls, and above her, somehow, was a clear night full of more stars than she had ever see in her life. Lily Evans walked forward through the splendor in a crowd of first years, nervously eyeing the older students who already seemed so sure of themselves, so confident in this castle that she would have to learn how to call home.

Coming from a muggle family of moderate income, a castle this grand and this magical was almost more than her eleven year old senses could take in. She felt like she was overwhelmed at every turn, wishing that her family or friends were here to help ease her into boarding school life. Lily had knocked over that poor, black haired boys things on the train, had nearly taken another students identical luggage, had almost missed the groundskeeper calling for the first years to get into the boats...for Lily, who had previously been a popular, straight-A student, this was not an ideal start.

Lily and the other first years gathered at the front of the hall. Albus Dumbledore stood up, and walked to the podium.

"Hello, and welcome back or for the first time to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The sorting will begin in a moment-"

Sorting? Into what, exactly? Lily thought.

"-but before that can begin, I have a few announcements. One, signup sheets for clubs and activities can be found on the announcement boards of your house common rooms. Participation in these activities is encouraged, but certainly not required. Two, as always, the forbidden forest is out of bounds to all students. And, finally, if anyone has seen my favorite porcelain teacup with the little mice dancing on it, you may return it to me, no questions asked."

Dumbledore smiled. "Now, without further ado, please welcome the Sorting Hat!" He gestured to the seemingly unoccupied stool next to him, and waved his wand in a complicated flourish. Then, with a BANG! and a cloud of smoke, a ratty old hat appeared. Said ratty, old hat cleared its nonexistent throat, and sang out

"I am the wise old sorting hat

My wisdom never fails

I'll tell you now a short story

I'll tell you now a tale

Four friends devised a clever plan

To teach their young disciples

But how to do exactly that

Was more than just a trifle

Wise Ravenclaw chose all the ones

Who studied, learned, and red

Shrewd Slytherin chose ambitious kids

Who're clever and well bred

Brave Gryffindor valued strength of heart

And courage through and through

Kind Hufflepuff took all the rest

And taught them, fair and true

So how to break the tie between

Four founders who can't agree

Why, find someone impartial to help

And luckily, that's me!

So rest me on your little head

Once I'm finished with this song

Don't worry, friends, I'll sort you all

To the house you belong."

The Great Hall erupted into applause. The Sorting Hat began to call up names, one by one. Lily had never felt so small, or so scared. She saw her classmates stand up and be sorted, one by one, until finally:

"Evans, Lily!"

Lily slowly walked up to the Hat, feeling the slightly judgmental eyes of every student and teacher on her. She sat down on the stool, and before the Hat even touched her head, it shouted, "GRYFFINDOR!"

She looked into the crowd, at the table that held her housemates which had erupted in thunderous applause. As she smiled a tremulous smile, suddenly feeling excitement slowly win out over the fear that had taken her, she locked eyes with the black haired boy from King's Cross. He was completely stone faced, but she felt something in her heart jerk her towards him as if he had been smiling welcomingly at her, pulling her in his direction even as her new classmates ushered her to her house table. She shook it off. There would be time to investigate him later; after all, she was just beginning here at Hogwarts.


	3. Year 2: Snape

Potions class.

Severus smiled to himself. He stood outside the door of Potions, the one class in which he seemed to really belong. Being a fairly naturally antisocial person, he preferred the classes that allowed him to work and depend only on himself, which were tragically few. Oh, he had his few hangers-on that were the children of his parents friends in the first few weeks of classes, but he found them particularly easy to shake once they realized that there would be no real benefit to becoming Severus' friend other than the occasional withering glare and request to leave him alone, please.

Really, it was better this way, he had almost convinced himself. He had almost managed to shut everyone out of his life entirely, except for his mother's neighbor's snot-nosed first year son, and Lily. Lily must have constant wax in her ears to not hear the things people would say when they saw the pair of them walking down the halls. Severus was mostly joking when he suggested that to her, but she refused to leave him alone. He was quietly, secretly grateful, but he tried his best to never acknowledge that fact to himself, let alone to her.

Was he her pet project? Charity case? Did he remind her of a friend back home? Severus shuddered to himself. She should have friends that were more fun and happier than him. He was meant to do great things, and great people worked alone. They had underlings not friends. The fact that he had difficulty making and maintaining personal relationships coincided nicely with that fact.

Still, it was nice to have a partner during the times that the Gryffindors and the Slytherins had Potions together. It was even nicer to be away from his house for a few minutes, the Slytherin house alternated between sucking up to him and talking about each other, and him, behind everyone else's back. Severus had no interest in inter-house politics, and he was lumped into a class of status-grubbing kids that would just as soon shank as smile at you, whichever benefited them more at the time.

Oh. He had stopped paying attention, wandering off in thought as he was liable to do from time to time. Lily was pushing puffer-fish eyes into his hand in order to complete their draught of swelling solution, and a shiver like a bolt of lightning ran down his spine for the first time in his cold, distant life. He shuddered reflexively.

"Sorry...I should have warned you, they were cold."

"Someday I'll forgive you."

She laughed. He shuddered. They continued to work quietly together for the rest of the period.


End file.
